How Being 10,000 Miles Away Has Created Clarity For Me
A Different View Changes Everything
I’m writing this from Melbourne, Australia.
A long way from home in every sense!
The pace feels different and the rhythm of the days has changed as I’ve been spending time looking after my young grandchildren.
I’d forgotten how their sense of curiosity and joy in the moment is very real. They move at a different (faster!) pace and what matters to them is immediate, simple and uncomplicated.
And somewhere in the middle of all of that, I’ve noticed something I wasn’t expecting.
Things that felt quite important before don’t seem as significant anymore.
Decisions that seemed pressing feel less urgent.
Some thoughts have faded into the background, while others have become clearer.
Nothing has actually changed but the shift in environment, and in perspective, seems to change how I’m seeing things.
When We’re Too Close to See Clearly
It’s been really interesting and it’s taken me straight back to coaching.
In coaching, we’re often helping clients find that same sense of perspective.
Not by physically stepping away, but by creating just enough space for them to see things differently.
When we’re very close to something, especially something that matters, it’s easy to get caught up inside it.
We stay close to the detail, we go over and over the same lines of thinking and it feels heavy.
From that place, everything can feel tangled and complicated.
What a Little Distance Makes Possible
When there’s a bit of distance, something shifts.
The situation is still there, it is still important but there’s a little more room around it.
We become more aware of patterns and what’s really going on becomes easier to identify.
In coaching, that’s often the moment where things begin to move and shift.
It doesn’t usually come from a brilliant question or a clever reframe. It tends to come when the client has enough space to hear themselves think in a different way.
You can almost feel it in the conversation.
There’s a pause that isn’t rushed, something opens up and the client starts to see it for themselves.
The Subtle Work of the Coach
Creating that kind of space is often more subtle than it looks.
We have to hold back more than step in, to stay with what’s there rather than shaping it too quickly.
It needs us to trust that the client will find their way if we don’t close things down too soon.
Being here has reminded me how powerful that space can be.
Clarity doesn’t always come from pushing harder or thinking more. Often it seems to come when there’s just enough distance for things to settle and reorganise.
When the Way We See Ourselves Shifts
There’s something else I’ve been aware of as well.
Spending time with young children has a way of quietly shifting your perspective.
They’re not interested in roles or expectations. They respond to what’s right in front of them. They ask simple, direct questions. They don’t carry the same layers of assumption about how things “should” be.
And it has made me notice my own.
When you’re this far from home, alongside that kind of presence, some of the usual reference points fade into the background a little.
And that feels very similar to what happens in deeper coaching.
As clients begin to step back from their situation, the way they see themselves often begins to shift.
The identity they’ve been holding can feel a little less fixed. The leader who has to get it right all the time. The one who carries everything. The person who believes they should have worked this out by now.
With a bit more space, those ways of seeing themselves loosen. They don’t disappear, but they’re no longer quite as solid or unquestioned.
And in that space, something new emerges. It may be a different perspective, or a different way of responding or even a different sense of who they are in the situation.
Which brings me to a couple of questions for you.
A Couple of Questions for You…..
Where might you be so close to something right now that it’s hard to see it clearly?
And what might shift if you allowed yourself just a little more distance?
Until next time,
Cath
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