10 Things I Wish I’d Known When I Started Coaching 23 Years Ago – Reflections from an ICF Master Certified Coach

When I started coaching over 23 years ago, now, I was passionate, eager, and determined to make a difference.

Looking back now as an ICF Master Certified Coach, there are so many things I wish I’d known then that would have made the journey smoother, more fulfilling, and—honestly! —a little less stressful.

If I could go back and have a chat with my younger coaching self, here’s what I’d say:

1. You Don’t Need to Have All the Answers

Coaching isn’t about having the perfect solution for your client—it’s about creating the space for them to find their own.

At the beginning, I sometimes felt under pressure to make sure my client got what they came for- that it was my responsibility that they got it .

But over the years I’ve realised that real transformation happens when the client discovers their own path.

 

2. The Power of Silence

Silence felt uncomfortable at first.

I thought I had to keep the conversation moving.

I’ve since learned that silence is where some of the biggest insights happen.

If you trust the process and trust yourself as a coach then silence is a gift.

 

3. Coaching Isn’t Just About Techniques

I used to focus on getting the “right” model, the “right” question, the “right” structure.

But coaching is so much more than that—it’s about presence, trust, and connection.

The techniques and models are tools and it isfar more powerful when you let go of your reliance on them and come from a place of genuine connection.

 

4. You Don’t Have to Be the Perfect Coach

Early on, I put so much pressure on myself to be perfect in every session.

The reality is that there’s no such thing as a perfect coach.ing session or the perfect coach.

The key is to develop your reflective practice to continue learning and growing.

 

5. Clients Aren’t Looking for a Guru

Imposter syndrome used to creep in—what if I wasn’t “good enough” or “experienced enough”?

But coaching isn’t about having all the wisdom.

Clients don’t need an expert. They need a partner who is willing to challenge and support them.

 

6. Not Every Client is a Good Fit

I used to find it hard to say “no” to a client beacuse I wanted to help everyone!

But I learned the hard way that not every client is a good fit. And that’s fine.

It’s about trusting your intuition- if it doesn’t feel like a good fit it won’t be!

Now I only work with clients who I have a genuine connection with that I know I can serve.

 

7. Boundaries Matter—A Lot

It took me a while to realise that having clear boundaries as a coach is essential.

Overgiving, overextending, or trying to work with everyone leads to burnout.

Now, I protect my time and my energy so I can show up fully for my clients at the same time as looking after my own well-being.

 

8. Professional Development Never Stops

Even after thousands of hours of coaching, I’m still learning.

The best coaches stay curious, keep refining and developing their skills and invest in their own growth.

The moment you think you’ve “arrived” is the moment you stop evolving.

9. The ICF Credential Process is Worth It

I put off getting a credential for years because I didn’t think I needed one.

It was only when I lost a significant corporate coaching contract because I didn’t have one, that I changed my mind.

Becoming an ICF Master Certified Coach has been a game-changer for me, both personally and professionally.

It has been a rigorous and challenging journey that has elevated my skills, confidence, and credibility.

And it has opened up opportunities I otherwise would not have had.

I only wish I’d started sooner!

 

10. Coaching is the Best Job in the World

Despite the challenges and the moments of self-doubt, I wouldn’t change a thing.

Coaching transforms lives—including your own.

And after 23 years, I still wake up excited to do this work.

 

If you’re on your own coaching journey, know this: you’re exactly where you need to be.

Keep going, keep learning, and enjoy the ride. It’s worth it.

 

until next time

Best wishes

Cath

P.S. If you want to have a chat about anything in this post then let’s have a conversation.

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